Calling all Facebook developers! Prepare to be gifted with 3 ideas of pure viral gold!

Thought Zombies and Vampires had the Facebook masses a-clickin’ like crazy? Wait till they get a load of your version of one of these sure fire winners. Just be sure to remember who turned you onto your claim to Internet fame when you reach your first million hits!

1. Kill Bill Uma vs. Catwoman Halle. The potential instant Web-meme wildfire of this ultimate claws-meets-swords killer beauty showdown has already been well-documented.

Well…I know at least me and Anand and Meg would play.

Well…I know at least me and Anand and Meg would play after about 10 beers.

2. Singing Idol vs Fighting Robot. Watch enough battle bot anime and you’ll see why this’ll sell hot like fire, like me and Mariah, like babys and paz-uh-fiii-uhs in the Japanese market. Disclaimer: If he decides to pursue legal action, may require a small profit split with Orion on this one, who I think actually said the idea out loud before I totally wrote it here, therefore stealing it as my own! Eat it, Harbour! Ruby’s 80-20 proven again!

3. Unicorn vs Pegasus. Chimeras get more points than Unicorns, but Big Gay Al get more points than Rocky Balboa. Who in turn gets the smack down by Leelu from The Fifth Element. But only if the player spend the 100 bucks to by her a Moolti-pass. Big ba-da-BOOM!

Fire up those code editors, kids! Fame and fortune await!

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And continuing to bleed the hype, hoping it won’t run dry - because I do dig the fact RDJ’s gone from ex-convict Hollywood pariah to A-List blockbuster buster, and seems to be handling it with the same grain-of-salt attitude towards film and fame as he did during his drug haze days - here’s today’s Downey Love:

After getting a bunch of pings as a result of the SF Cocktail Week post, I realized how gimpy and neglected some of this site had become. Hopefully stuff’s running smoother now - especially the Comments sections, which I’ve been told previously sucked. So leave a note if your digging on the mildly refreshed look and flow..or if its still aching your click finger.

Continuing on the Everybody Loves Robert bandwagon, here’s one of his many scenes from the only successful pro-gay film noir holiday murder comedy every made, Kiss Kiss Bang Bang. Its funny, dark, smart, dangerous, filled with Christmas cheer and on my top ten.

Here, professional criminal/aspiring actor RDJ and gay private eye Val Kilmer (unsuccessfully) try and threaten a heavy into providing them with info on a girl that (they think) has been murdered. Got all that? Good. Roll clip.

(Thanks to Lady Miss Meg for renting the flic for my first viewing…and Sir Sutton for emailing me a scan of the napkin he was the first to recommend the flic to me on, after I left it soaking in bourbon on the bar top.)

If you’re in San Francisco next week be sure to check out the annual San Francisco Cocktail Week. Duggan, Jeff & H join forces once again to cook up a whirlwind week of cool cocktail parties, literary events and spirit-geared dinners to celebrate, in their words, “the dynamic beverage culture of our community…both the classic cocktail concoction and the avant-garde potation.”

Already on my calendar is the Literature, Booze and History panel & discussion to benefit the San Francisco Museum and Historical Society, moderated by the always eloquent and rapier witted San Francisco Magazine writer/editor Scott Hocker, with the after party next door at my favorite neighborhood Cantina. And if last year is any indication, this year’s week end gala at Absinthe should rock, promising patron’s access to an “Absinthe den” in their usually Newsom-types-only plush private dining room, helmed by the lovely Ms. Vanessa Harris.

To view a complete list of events, and even download it as a PDF you can refer to throughout your week-long wonderfully comfortable rye, gin & Absinthe haze, check out www.sfcocktailweek.com.

EXTRA: To get you in the mood for classic libations a plenty, and realize why it’s the personalities that make Absinthe (the place) one of the best bar experiences in SF, check out Absinthe bar manager and nationally recognized mixologist Jonny Raglin in this clip on the recent legalization of absinthe (the liquid) in the States. Be patient and sit through the inevitable pre-show advertisment & the cookie cutter newscaster…its worth it to enjoy the superior charm and coiffe of this SF legend:

1. To watch Robert Downey being himself. Well, himself flying around in a metal war machine suit powered by a mini-nuclear reactor, but himself nonetheless. Downey’s got that rare ability to not only pull off playing a snarky intellectual party boy wise ass that ladies love and guys would love to be…but also a snarky intellectual party boy wise ass that you care for, isn’t afraid to reveal his flaws and isn’t just constantly reminding the world not to take itself too seriously…but also reminding himself.

2. To hear the best line ever uttered by Downey or anyone else ordering a drink at a bar (though I wouldn’t be surprised if it were an ad lib of his own that ended up in the final cut, as so much of the movie gleefully sounds like):

“Can I get a scotch? I’m starving.”

3. Iron Man has a private jet with an in-cabin stripper pole and 3 exotic dancers for airline attendants.

Here’s the best of the trailers to get you hyped up:

FAIR WARNING: though I’m not one of them, some may find the content of this podcast really, really, really, really offensive.

Howard Stern before he sucked + Letterman if he was on cable = the Sick and Wrong podcast. Highly entertaining & chock full of the undeniable truth, hosts D. Simon and Lance Wackerle discuss the most vile, disquieting, and oddly amusing news items over the course of 30 minutes and a case of beer.

Recent topics: myths of LSD, grotesque installation art, a live interview with the guy who claims his girlfriend’s passion broke his penis and herbally induced abortions vs. birth control via white witchcraft. Plus they’re based out of thimble-sized San Francisco, so of course we know someone who knows them.

Their banter’s incredibly reminiscent of 90% of the conversations Rocket and I have had late at night around the kitchen table at 227…in fact further evidence that he and I should have our own show. As well as strongly echoing the conversations Biz, Binger and I held while sitting in our boxers listening to Dre’s Chronic with Vic’s Vapor Rub smeared on forwards, chasing bong hits with nitrous while on acid. Which is a compliment.